deranged_dream

PEOPLE - 
[] ask if I’m bulimic 
[x] call me fat 
[] say I’m skinny 
[] say I’m ugly 
[] say I’m pretty 
[ x] spread rumors about me 
[] force me to eat 
[] say I eat too much 
[] wish I’d eat more 
[x] don't know I'm anorexic/bulimic


I WISH - 
[x] I was THIN 
[x] I had a better body 
[x] I didn't have to eat 
[x] I could control myself 
[x] I was under 100 lbs 
[] I could avoid food 
[x] I could hide what I am 
[x] I wasn’t fat 
[x] I was pretty 
[sometimes] I could stop being ana/mia

I LOVE - 
[x] feeling hungry 
[x] seeing a difference when fasting 
[ ] shaking 
[x] being weak 
[x] losing weight 
[ ] being anorexic/bulimic
[] green tea 
[ ] diet pills 
[x] being able to turn down food 
[ x] feeling good about myself

APPEARANCE 
[] I am shorter than 5'4. 
[x] I think I'm ugly sometimes. 
[x] I have many scars. 
[x] I tan easily. 
[ x] I wish my hair was a different color. 
[] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color. 
[count scars saying things?] I have a tattoo. 
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance. 
[] I have/had braces. 
[] I wear glasses. 
[x] I would get plastic surgery 
[] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger. 
[x] I have more than 2 piercings. 
[x] I have piercings in places besides my ears. 
[] I have freckles.


FAMILY 
[x] I've sworn at my parents. 
[x] I've run away from home. 
[x] I've been kicked out of the house. 
[] My biological parents are together. 
[] I have a sibling less than one year old. 
[] I want to have kids someday. 
[] I've had children. 
[x] I've lost a child.

EMBARRASSMENT 
[x] I've slipped out a "lol" in a spoken conversation. 
[x] Disney movies still make me cry. 
[] I've peed from laughing. 
[] I've snorted while laughing. 
[x] I've laughed so hard I've cried. 
[x] I've glued my hand to something 
[] I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose. 
[x] I've had my trousers rip in public.

RELATIONSHIPS 
[] I'm single 
[x] I'm in a relationship. 
[] I'm engaged. 
[] I'm married. 
[] I've gone on a blind date. 
[] I've been the dumpee more than the dumper. 
[x] I miss someone right now. 
[x] I have a fear of abandonment. 
[] I've cheated in a relationship. 
[] I've gotten divorced 
[x] I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back. 
[x] I've told someone I loved them when I didn't. 
[x] I've told someone I didn't love them when I did. 
[x] I've kept something from a past relationship.

SEXUALITY 
[x] I've had a crush on someone of the same sex. 
[x] I've had a crush on a teacher. 
[] I am a cuddler. 
[x] I've been kissed in the rain. 
[x] I've hugged a stranger. 
[] I have kissed a stranger.

HONESTY 
[x] I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't 
[x] I've done something I promised myself I wouldn't. 
[x] I've snuck out of my house. 
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am. 
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world 
[x] I've cheated while playing a game. 
[x] I've cheated on a test. 
[ ] I've been suspended from school.

BAD TIMES 
[x] I've consumed alcohol. 
[x] I regularly drink. 
[ ] I can't swallow pills. 
[x] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time 
[x] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression. 
[x] I shut others out when I'm upset. 
[x] take anti-depressants. 
[x] I'm anorexic or bulimic or have EDNOS. 
[x] I've slept an entire day when I didn't need it. 
[x] I've hurt myself on purpose. 
[x] I'm addicted to self harm. 
[x] I've woken up crying 
[x] I've lost weight 
[x] I've gained weight 
[x] My weight holds me back 
[x] Weight consumes me. 
[] I'm at my thinnest 
[ ]I'm at my biggest 
[x] I've lost weight and kept it off 
[x] I've lost weight but gained it back 
[x] My weight affects my mood 
[x] I weigh myself daily 
[x] I am jealous of everyone smaller than me 
[] I thrive on compliments 
[x] I feel bigger than people who are my size 
[x] I feel happy when I'm hungry 
[x] I get depressed after I eat - if i ate too much or something unhealthy 
[x] I've skipped a meal 
[x] I've thrown food away 
[x] I've spit food out 
[x] I've fasted 
[x]I've taken diet pills 
[x]i've used laxatives 
[x] I've purged

HAVE/HAD 
[x] Bulimia 
[] Anorexia 
[x] Ednos 
[] Orthorexia 
[] Over-exercising 
[x] Binge eating
[x] I exercise 
[x] I exercise so I can eat 
[x] I work out secretly 
[x] I work out daily 
[x] I exercise to counteract eating 
[x] I've fainted from exhaustion

I've done: 
[x] Weed 
[x] Cigarettes 
[x] Alcohol 
[x] Diet pills 
[x] Pain killers 
[x] Anti-depressants 
[x] Ecstasy 
[ ] LSD 
[x] Mushrooms 
[x] Speed 
[ ] Cocaine 
[ ] Herion
[x] Other

[x] I keep my eating habits a secret 
[] I have a ED blog
[x] I look at thinspo 
[x] I collect thinspo 
[] I condone pro-ana/mia sites 
[x] I count calories 
[x] I've had negative intake days 
[x] I avoid food 
[x] I hate food 
[] I love food

[sometimes] I want to be this way 
[x] I don't want to be like this 
[x] I wish I could have more control
[x] Being thin is my top priority  
[more terrified than not wanting] I don't want to get better
[] I do want to get better 
[] I am in treatment
[x] I'm doing this for me 
[] I'm doing this for someone 
[x] I'm doing this to prove that i have control.